Bring the Rain

For the last two weeks, I've successfully lost myself in a compelling biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer. Page after brilliantly-written page, this hero of the faith is documented and interwoven throughout a detailed retelling of the tumultuous history of Germany.  Time and again, I am struck by Bonhoeffer's faith.

This man, facing incredible opposition on all sides, had such clarity of God's will for his life and such conviction to follow it.  He thought deeply and earnestly about Scripture; and his Christian life was very much  not self-contained.  His love for God overflowed into love and service for others - with no thought for himself.

As I've read these pages, I am challenged, encouraged, and extraordinarily convicted.  Bonhoeffer risked so much for the sake of Christ and His Church.  Fearlessly, he dared to stand counterculturally risking the loss of everything.  Over and over I have marveled to myself, "This!  This is the kind of faith I want to have! Living, breathing, active, real rubber-meets-the-road kind of faith!"  And then I hesitate. Do I really want to pray for that? Do I really want to risk my comfortable life for the radical cost of discipleship? Ultimately, I suppose that means that my heart is asking, 'Is it worth it?'.  How can this wicked heart of mine even think that?!  

Romans 8:16-18 says, "The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."  My hesitation to pray for suffering belies my lack of belief in the goodness of God.

Oh, that I would have the courage and the strength to pray for this crazy, real, Bonhoeffer-esque faith! That I would have the faith to pray, "Jesus, bring the rain."